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there like a blowtorch burning

June 11, 2012

On days like today I really do wish that there was something printed somewhere that would give me exactly what I need, which is some motherfucking direction on this motherfucking plane. It’s not like I am changing my major (again) or quitting my job or going directly off the edge of some other crazy cliff, it’s just that my life is currently to the point where most shit is handled and everything there is to do is either one of two finals or not very important. And this is making me squirrelly. As much as any theist I enjoy the presence of some automatic purpose in my life. Some people get off on doing what ‘god’ ‘says,’ other people get off on working body mind and soul into the ground for the thrill of the challenge and the love of the game. My number one game is going on summer sabbatical, and suddenly I’m looking around wondering what the damn hell I’m going to do for the next three months that can help me keep as self actualized and fulfilled as a stable school load. Because there is no way I am going to spend this summer simply dicking around. As soon as that last test is conquered I am going to go out in scandalous clothing in extravagant colors and whoop it the fuck up, but the entire point of whooping it up in the first place is that you just got out of something important and you’re heading right back into it. I can’t deal with a summer of insignificance, is what I think. I want to go chop wood or something. Make sandworlds for small children. Deliver breakfast burritos to homeless folk. Squeeze an entire tube of toothpaste into the sink.

I am too a merry sunshine.

I am

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One Response to “there like a blowtorch burning”

  1. Beorn Says:

    Now I’m just being annoying:

    Like


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